Discovering Entrepreneur Passion with James Williams

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An entrepreneur is something we were born to be. James Williams joins us to discuss his journey toward discovering his entrepreneurial passion. His journey into coaching others to excel at life, be tough with your emotions, and be the Titan you were born to be. 

Highlights:

{01:21} What makes James a Titan?

{19:33} The importance of being emotional 

{26:22} Learning the lessons life sends us

{36:23} Examples from James’ life

{44:01} Exciting news

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James Williams Bio

In 2015 James was on the tail end of a 12-year career that wasn’t bringing out the best in him, and so he chose to make a change and go against the grain of what he was taught was possible. The foundation of this passionate pursuit is a deep need to serve. Growing up thinking differently from the rest of his family and not thriving at school, James learned to receive love by being useful to others. His mother had heart disease, he grew up in a turbulent family dynamic that ended with separated parents, and two close friends who took their own lives leading to a journey of finding his place in the world.

The conclusion- James believes it is selfish to put others first. Why?… because to serve those he loves and leads, James realized he must be at full capacity. This comes from self-care to create more of what James calls; intentional quality of output.

Today James is a Performance Breakthrough Coach and speaker. He is passionate about focusing on creating outer world impact through inner world mastery. His passion for mastering physical, mental, and emotional performance in pursuit of his own life goals is only matched by his dedication to supporting his clients’ belief that anything is possible and available for them.

James believes that the relationship we have with ourselves is the foundational key to our personal growth and the quality of the relationships we hold dear in our life. As well as teaching and coaching the female entrepreneurs in his wife’s company I Heart My Life since 2015, James also works with a range of very successful male and female business owners and high achievers to support them in leveling up. James works with his clients through systematic processes to learn how to master what he calls the ‘business of you. This idea is to support his clients in recognizing that their level of performance from within will impact everything and everyone in their life.

Connect with James:

james@thegrowthedge.com

https://thegrowthedge.com

https://www.linkedin.com/in/james-r-s-williams

Welcome back to our show. I’m Carol Carpenter, and I’m joined here by my co-host, Travis Johnson. And we have as our guest today, a Brit.

Yeah, I know I just said that right? Did I have to go there? Possibly not, but we’re just going to say it’s James Williams.

The BRIT, I think you are the first Brit that we’ve interviewed. Is that correct for this podcast? So, James is a performance breakthrough coach and a speaker, and he’s passionate about focusing on creating outer world impact through inner world mastery.

Welcome. 

Thank you very much for having me, guys. You know what? It’s been a pleasure to meet you thus far; thank you.

Yes, you could be brief after what we said before we started this podcast

We’ve had a bear farm before we went live, people.

It’s just the warm-up. We have to warm up. you up a little bit.

Some people get a bit nervous. You’re not going to have a problem. You dove right in.

Yeah, you’ve got to stretch. Before you get into this stuff, you never know what’s going to happen. I would hate for you to not be warmed up and pull a muscle or something during any of that.

It would be disastrous. I know that would be bad for sure, no? I’m warm, I’m ready. 

Loose and limber. I’d love to hear it, James. I’ve got to know what makes you a Titan.

What makes me a Titan? Well, as I said, you know, I love this question because you’re immediately starting with what I appreciate about myself. As a coach, I believe what distinguishes me as a Titan is my ability to bounce back, a phrase I stole from my previous job in television.

It was a phrase that was kind of made-up for a show that ended up getting put in the English Dictionary. We’re very proud of this, and it’s the ability to go through struggle, to fail, and then to bounce back very, very quickly, and I think it’s this innate ability to put my perspective before my circumstances, which is something I’ve always had, but it’s something I’ve had to cultivate to be stronger, especially as an entrepreneur, because I wasn’t always an entrepreneur, and so I’d say that, right?

Do you want to talk about that too? I would like to kind of have an idea of how you first started. Not all of us started as entrepreneurs. We’ve started in other phases of our lives, right where we held jobs before we decided to leap to become entrepreneurs.

I’ll ask the question. When you were, you know, studying at university, did you have an idea of what you wanted to be at that time? 

No, I mean You know, interesting. An entrepreneur is something I think we’re kind of born to be, but I certainly didn’t exercise that. But more of just being naive. I mean, at the university where I studied, the majority of the emphasis was on either side of the bar. To be honest with you, I mean in my late teens and early 20s, I didn’t have a clue what I wanted to do, and I think I was a bit lost.

And so, I was a very creative person, and so I actually ended up studying things like graphic design and advertising and just using my creativity for that. And by the way, it was a lot of fun. I was completely clueless as to what my purpose was, and I certainly didn’t recognize my Titan abilities at that point. I was lost, completely lost, and so I just did what I thought I could do, and things worked out for me, though. You know, I left university and I said, “You know, I’m going to go travel around the world or dig around the world. 

I went to the other side of the world; I went to Australia for seven months on my own. I kept a relationship with a guy that I knew was working in TV, and when I got back, I managed to convince this big television company to hire me with no real experience.

I made the T for free because there were no jobs available at the time, and they bought it; I worked for them for free for a few months before they hired me, and then I was there for 12 years, so even though there was some of my Titan, I just didn’t know it. 

Right. See, I love that because you were willing to do what it took regardless of what kind of outcome it was going to have So many of us, I’m assuming around the world but especially in America, the first thing we do when we finally get the ability to do something is get ourselves into debt.

So, you can’t go make tea for free to eventually get to work for a TV show production.

Well, the interesting thing was that I was, you know, I got back from traveling and I was living with my dad.

I didn’t have any rights. I was living with my dad. I was working, driving a van, and delivering camera equipment around the country right where I was. I’d have to get up at like 5:00 AM, drive to the other side of London to pick up the van, then deliver camera equipment around the country, return the van, drive all the way home, and then work. However, on many days, they would allow me to at this TV company for free So I was kind of working seven days a week. And I was. I wasn’t earning. I wasn’t earning a lot of money at all, so I had to live at home with my dad.

But it was passion, right? It’s like, at the time, television company, all this excitement and, like, these amazing sports stars and just this vibe and people that I loved, I was like, “This is going to happen,” and it was the first proof, I guess, for me. When you’re passionate about something, that’s when that entrepreneurial mindset comes in, which is that I’m not going to follow the rules.

You know, apply for a job, go to an interview, and have a, you know, a showreel. I’m going to just make it. Is there any way I can make this happen? Which is kind of an entrepreneurial mindset, right?

Well, you found a way to get your foot in the door, right? Which is what an entrepreneur does. From that point, you can figure it out. It’s like always understanding the why, the how always comes about.

But how is it not our business?

No, it isn’t. You know, you just have to know why, like what you’re passionate about and when to do that. For some, the universe aligns things for you when you’re in that mode It’s crazy.

Well, I mean, we break it down. Is it crazy, as if I’m expressing the best version of myself? How does that then translate to every action I take, everything I say, and the decisions I make, right? They equate to better outcomes, right? 

Because it’s coming from the best version of myself, when you break it down, it’s not crazy. I think it makes complete sense, but it’s like how many people are operating from that place by just saying I’m only going to act on things I’m passionate about, not the things I feel obligated to do.

Very, very true.

I think it has a great deal to do with intention as well if it comes from a good place. I don’t know if I’ve told this story on this podcast before. I’m sure Carol will remind me, but when? You’ve got a fly bouncing against a window in your house.

I know where this is, Gary.

Oh God, here we go.

Yeah, there’s no amount of effort that that fly can put into that glass to get through the glass. There’s none. He can fly at 1000 miles an hour, or his body is not going to survive the impact. There’s no amount of work that flight can do, even though he can see his goal right there, the windows blocking him.

However, if he moves three feet and circles three feet toward the open door, he can fly effortlessly towards his goal, right? It’s not the effort that you put in; effort is not required for Victory.

No, it’s spot on, right? Right. Einstein himself stated that it is how many people try the same thing over and over and expect a different result.

That’s the definition of insanity.

Yeah, that fly story is from the book “U Squared” by Price Pritchett. It’s one of the opening stories in that book.

U squared, yeah.

And the follow-up and quantum leap theories. Those are great, tiny little thin books. They are genius, though.

Which one did you mention you squared with was the other one?

Then you’ve got you squared as the first one, and then the quantum leap theory I think that that’s a follow-up. For that, I’ll put it down here somewhere. I won’t waste time on the podcast, but it’s down, there are two of them that you can. I wrote that there’s a follow-up talk about pocketbooks that you need to carry everywhere with you because they’re really frightened. You know, life guides.

They’re amazing.

There are so many little stories like that, so many little allegorical stories that are collected throughout history that just bring home and solidify a theory. It just makes it so easy to understand, which is the whole purpose of an allegory, and so many people know this, and they can repeat it, but applying it always seems to be lacking.

I know growing up for me, I’m sure there was a scene for you that said something like “Knowledge is Power” and I’ve changed how I feel about that statement because I don’t feel that Knowledge is Power specifically, I feel like knowledge is potential power because it doesn’t do **** if you never apply it.

Yes, but knowledge is only knowledge unless it’s integrated or acted upon. How many times have you mentioned, you know, a book or a podcast for something that someone wants to work on, and they’ll say, “Oh, you’ve read that book or listened to that podcast,” and you say, “But have you implemented what it says in that book?”

Like, well, no, I know it 

What do you do that you know?

There’s information in my head, but that’s just information, right? And many people know a lot of things, but there’s a big difference between common sense and common practice. big difference.

That is an excellent point. So then at what point did you decide to become a coach?

The Titan.

That’s right.

Unleash the Titans.

And when did I unleash my Titan?

When did you do it? You unleash your Titan appropriately.

Let’s not do that because it gets weird.

Yeah, we won’t do that So, well, this is a science story, because it wasn’t just about me. And I was about six years into it, 12 years into it, and it was incredible working for that company. I love all of them there, but it started to get unfulfilling. And so, I started to reinvent myself. So, I was like, “I’m going to do it. I’m going to become a different person in this role.”

I learned some tricks. I learned this intense live playout 3D software and I was the first person to be self-taught in that role. Neither will they hire experts, and I was like, “Great extrinsic. Uhm, rewards?” And I was all about those rights, those intrinsic rewards. 

Lots of love from the outside. And then that would get stale. And I try something else, and I start to realize. Wait a minute. I’m filling myself from the outside, filling myself up from the outside in This is not for me anymore, and it wasn’t the place it was This is not where it is meant to be. Nowhere for me to go. I had to go somewhere other than management, which is not what I wanted to And so I was in this place. I guess I’d just open up to what else is there.

And I was an avid practitioner or reader of personal development. I certainly never thought that it would be a career until I met, who is now my wife of 10 years. Now, Emily, you know, she was She’s from Columbus, OH, and she moved to London just to study. She wanted to be in London, so she just picked a random course.

Anyway, I met Emily, at the time in her mid-20s, who came from a family of entrepreneurs, but she already had that mindset of “I’m not going to work for someone.” I know I’m going to change the world on my own, and I loved that I lapped that up, because I didn’t grow up with that.

And to make a long story short, she got into wanting to create a coaching business. So, she did some courses, and I jumped over that. I was sort of looking over her shoulder, reading all this stuff, and I was seeing what was happening to her, and she’s your typical type A personality who will work every hour God sends her. She was told this was something she could handle in her twenties. No way it’s going to last forever, I thought. I could see this gap. In Y, the real reason that new businesses fail, and it’s not to do with the wrong business strategy or the wrong team.

It’s the inability to handle failure. Because you burned out. Because you’re running up against the edge so often that you don’t have anything left in the tank when the proverbial hits the fan, right? And so that’s when I found Brendan Bouchard and I studied his, you know, his high-performance theory, and in 2016, exactly a year to the day that I left my job in television, I became certified as a high-performance coach.

And that’s when it all started because I was then plugged into the program she was creating. They have to support those clients with their performance so that they are capable. They wanted to make the businesses they wanted to start a reality and be the person they needed to be when they had all that responsibility and all that failure to manage correctly.

And that’s when that started. So, it was seamless to meet Emily. She kind of unlocked something in me, making me realize that I would be a great coach. I simply needed to master the theories and gain the ability to coach in this area, so I left. So, I became a certified hub for scoped in 2016 and we’ve been working together ever since, doing our things as well as working together.

I love that husband-and-wife team.

So, I think we should have her on the show. She is home right now. Do you want to go get her?

It’s nice; it’s working. OK, we’ll get her on this another time, for sure. Yeah, there you go. Going forward She’s a celebrity. I mean, she’s the reason I’m a coach. She is so many other things, right? She’s what I call a pure visionary and a founder. You know, she’s the person that you know. When she gives you a dream, it will overwhelm you just by the number of things she says. I mean, we’re talking, you know, movement, you know, mass influence, especially for female visionaries, where she’s got a big vision to support women in knowing that they can do anything they want to do and there is no story or, you know, family patterns or generational trauma that is going to stop the next generation from having the impact on the world we all know amazing women can have.

I think though, sometimes the traumas that we face, I mean, I faced him as a child. My culture inflicted that on me without any choice, but I think those traumas make you the person that you become.

Yeah, that’s the fire.

You know, and yeah, it does it. I was restricted and placed in a box with everything, right?

But the minute I broke loose from the family unit, it did it. It set a fire under my asking to do, you know, great things because I didn’t want another woman to have to go through that again. You know, if I could free some women from feeling that oppressed and that invaluable with so little self-work, hell, I’m going to go do that.

It’s called righteous anger. They talk about that in the Bible a little bit. It’s both and not. I’m not saying it to say there’s a thing. But like people that talk about Christianity and how peaceful and merciful Jesus is, they forget that he went and cleared up the Tabernacle, was whipping people that were selling stuff on his, you know, in his father’s house.

I forgot that little bit of spiciness of Jesus, so that righteous anger, there’s not a problem with anger in particular.

It’s the direction you put it in, right? And I think what parents are talking about is like directing anger into a positive solution. And I think because anguish just ends. And I think that’s what we’re seeing right now and having, you know, being a part of Emily Company for so many years and working exclusively with female visionaries during that time.

And I had worked with guys on my stuff, like, because in general, this is generalizing a little bit, women tend to have more access to their emotions and discussing their emotions That power, when directed positively, is very powerful and very inspiring.

Right. 

And I think we’re living in a world where even guys are starting to wake up to their emotional ability. There’s something very special happening for both sexes, but you know, I have worked with a lot of amazing women over the last few years and it’s incredible, and there’s still a lot of work being done to show women that they have the choice and the ability to do anything they want.

But they have a responsibility to do that because if we want the next generation and the generation after that to heal, if they have this kind of power for men and women to have an equal impact on this planet, then it’s their responsibility to do that. And I think that’s where this hits hard for mothers, especially knowing that their kids are modeling themselves after how they see their parents behaving. Men and women, they’re modeling.

So, if you don’t take care of yourself as a parent so that you can serve at your best, your children and those you love will model that, and so when children are watching Carol and what she’s done. They’re modeling that. They’re saying, “Oh, this is what I did from the beginning. This is not something I will overcome later on. I can do this from the book.

Which is right.

Although I was a late bloomer, my children didn’t see me become an entrepreneur until after I got divorced, so they were involved in that process as well, just because it happened the way it did. They also saw that it doesn’t matter how old you are, it doesn’t matter what sex you are, and you can do anything whenever You want it, right? You just have to have a passion for it. That’s it and they and they saw my passion for what I do. And they know it’s not. It’s not as absurd as people would say. People thought, honestly, God, James, they thought I was having a midlife crisis, literally.

You were, you were, but you held on because I was in my 40s.

I don’t know. I don’t

But you hold on.

I don’t think it. It was a midlife crisis, though Travis told me it was a loss.

Was it a crisis? Was it in the middle of your life?

No, it wasn’t a crisis. It’s midlife. It was me. It was me. I am finding my power. I would call it an awakening.

That’s great. That’s a great way to explain it. Yeah, yeah.

We’ve almost got it solved. Knowledge plus passion plus bounce-back ability. We’ve almost got this whole thing figured out right now. But you mentioned, James, you mentioned that your wife was in touch with her emotions. Was it that way growing up in London? Were you not in touch with your emotions?

For me, I mean, I’ve always been an emotional person, like, you know, even as a kid, a very curious, emotional person.

And I think, you know, in my journey of personal development, which is a constant journey, one thing that I keep coming back to is this point at which I think I folded. And I gave in to, you know, what I was trying to be taught, which was, you know, up until the age of 12, I was very unapologetic about my curiosity and my ability to say there must be a better way, but I kept that, kept getting thrown back in my face as being an argument You know, stopping argumentative things is just the way they are be grateful for what you’ve got and don’t push for anything more. All this kind of stuff, and you know, as a guy, it sucks. Suck it up. Don’t be so emotional. It’s kind of stuff.

And I think there was a point where I folded, and I said OK to fit in. Rewind, guys, I’m going to do that, and then that’s that. And travelers will know that as a teenage boy, you do go through a stage with things. Just get muddled up.

And it happens, you know, for girls going through their teenage years, but us guys, we mature a lot slower.

We’re just highly emotional creatures; we just like to have meltdowns and cry.

Right, but we guys sucked it upright. And we just kind of think that’s the thing to do.

We think it’s cool and it’s strong, right? And it’s not It’s weak and so, you know, I, at the time, didn’t think anyone was purposely being mean. It’s just what everyone thought was the way to be right, but it just innately wasn’t right for me, and I think I snapped out of that many, many times in my teens, but it took me being in my pre-20s to start to decide, wait a minute, this is not who you are. You’re not this, you know, emotionally stunted.

Your emotional guide was someone you knew. Which gives you access to emotions, the ability to understand people, to be empathetic, and to be compassionate. And that’s a superpower, but it, you know, my whole teenage years, that was certainly not expressed as much as I would have liked it would have been better if it had been..

For sure, men have to stifle their feelings. That was how my brother was even raised, right?

That was just me. I honestly think it’s because back then, that’s what they were raised like. Our parents were raised that way, so they just assumed that’s the way it was, and so in a way we have to almost forgive them. We need to be able to forgive ourselves for falling into that pattern.

Yeah, yeah, it’s for sure. You know, I was talking about this with someone the other day, and an interesting discussion, I think, needs to be had Is there a big difference between vulnerability in terms of being a victim because it’s your fuel to receive filling up from other people, and intentional vulnerability where you ask for support like a supplement?

Right. 

Now, a vulnerability in terms of I just need some support so that I can support myself in becoming stronger. That is a powerful, powerful thing to be able to do. The strongest men and women I’ve met can be strong while being vulnerable. But that, I think, we get. I think the world has been confused with vulnerabilities, which is the other thing that is being a victim.

Well, in searching for approval from everybody in the wrong way.

I’m outraged. I’m offended. Please pile on this train and let me know that I’m validated by the way that I feel. And blah, blah.

And they’re two different things.

Yeah, blah blah blah.

Right. 

So, the discussion needs to be had. You know, like, can we teach men and women what it means to be powerfully vulnerable? The board is there to supplement their growth and to show that we are all in this together.

We get to ask for support and give support as humanity as we grow together to be stronger rather than, you know, sucking the life out of each other, because we can’t, you know, be strong for ourselves.

Yeah, that’s huge. We covered this. If you’re listening to this show and it’s the first one you listen to, go back and listen to episode one where we interview our good friend Lou Marinoff, who talks It’s about freedom of speech and the right to not be offended. You have to give permission to be offended, and you can’t be a victim in an echo chamber. You can’t be a victim by yourself. You have to have people along for the ride for you to be a victim, which means you have to have people feeling sorry for you as if something happened to you. But the vast majority, especially as an adult, is mostly of your own making.

And I said you could argue that nothing ever really happens to us.

I know someone that would say it. It happened to us.

Yeah, exactly.

It’s life happening for us.

I agree.

And I know that’s triggering for some people that have been through some terrible things. But again, it goes back to what I said earlier about perspective. That whatever you’ve been through, there’s someone else who’s been through the same thing that doesn’t feel as traumatized by it as you. 

Why? Why?

Because there’s a perspective, right? There’s a step perspective for that person chosen. to enable themselves to gain strength. From that,

From the adversity, yeah. And so, there are lessons to be learned. This is what I say over and over to people you know. When people hear about your, mine, or Travis’s adversities, they’ll go, “Oh my God, that’s horrendous. 

And I look at it as, “Wow, what a great learning experience, right?” because I can see the positive in all the negatives. There is a reason for these things to happen, and there have even been instances where it’s a horrible circumstance that results from something that you know ends up happening. It was a lesson for me that was kind of a prelude to another deal that was coming up. And what’s interesting is it was like a forewarning, like learn the lesson now before this happens, and then this came along, I knew exactly what to do because I had experienced something to a much lesser degree before this, and it was a really interesting concept where I was like, “Oh, I’m just learning. Baby steps here because this one would cost me.”

Yeah, that’s great.

Right. That’s the big secret of life. Yes, or no? Do you know people that say this about their romantic relationships? Why did I keep attracting these losers? Why does it keep happening to me? We all have that experience, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It’s because of what you just said. There’s a lesson to be learned, and until the lesson is learned, you get to keep repeating the lesson till you get it figured out.

Hopefully, it isn’t wonderful how many lessons get thrown at us, right? Like even in your body, you keep feeling an emotion or a physical sensation that you don’t like, and it keeps happening. Your body is trying to say something, right?

Stop eating that thing, or stop doing that thing, or deal with this thing, and the more you ignore it, the louder it gets. You know, I was having this conversation with someone last night about whether they have, they’re having a repeating dream. And that’s what’s so interesting if you keep having it. What exactly is it?

What I’m trying to tell you

It’s a message.

Yeah, the totality of your subconscious is trying. To tell you something, what is it?

What is it? Delve into it.

I don’t understand. I keep seeing all these red flags. You’re not a circus. You’re not collecting red flags, sweetie. There’s no prize for winning the reddest flags. One enough, someone sits down and tells me, “Oh. Yeah, I’m just a little crazy.” I believe him. I’ll never talk. Thank you again. Thanks for warning me.

 And people say “What? That was the end of the conversation?”  Oh yeah. They told me unequivocally, in plain language, that they were nuts. I do not get time for nuts. I’ve got my nuts to deal with. I don’t have to worry about all that other stuff. I don’t need their nuts in my life.

Isn’t it interesting though that if this was someone’s business and they kept noticing that at a certain time of the year, there, you know, cash flow dipped? They would do it, they would get it, they would diagnose it, they would fix it, and they would move.

On, but when it’s this business, right? Is it business for you? That we don’t measure those metrics.

It’s just you just get used to it.

I don’t know the answer to the question, James. Tell us why.

Well, I think That it’s, you know. So, here’s hoping I didn’t write this when I was filling out the form. I think that especially for me in my life, we get taught to put other people first, which in theory sounds great; right party people first, be selfless, right… selfless…which is an interesting word alone. So, what happens then? If I get brought up with this idea of putting everyone else first, let’s say I’m a pair And I’m putting my kids first. You might know. I know as a parent that my kids deserve to have their dad at 100% so that he’s capable of all the unpredictability of life. But then, Yeah, how can I be 100%? How can I get myself 4 to 100% if I’m putting them first? It’s a conundrum.

It’s a commander.

great words So instead, I say it’s selfish. to put other people first.

Yeah, but we’re raised to put other people first. Even in my culture, we put everybody first. It was my duty as the eldest in my family to make sure all my cousins were taken care of. I also made sure the adults were taken care of because being the eldest female on my side of the family meant everything was on my shoulders. Right, so I didn’t know better than to make sure everybody was getting served before me.

We don’t understand the concept of, if I put it like this: if I gave myself each morning a small amount of time to fill up my cup, right, you know, mentally, emotionally, physically, getting myself primed to spill over and be of service to everyone I love. And everyone lead. And be prepared for the unpredictability of life. I’m primed for that, which means that everyone gets me at a better version of myself and I can.

I would rather have an hour or less with the people that I love. And I make sure that the whole time I am with them, there is a deep presence rather than this. On the phone You know, I’m kind of here. I know I see that all the time.

It drives me crazy. It’s like if you were spending time with your family, like, shouldn’t you put your phones away and engage in conversation?

Rather than the time I’ve had this conversation, there’s more depth.

quality. quality of time.

Debt and time and quality, yeah, it’s like people think the number of hours spent on something means positive reward And I would argue that the depth and quality of the time. I know, I know. I’ve got a good friend of mine who’s had to get himself to a place in his business where he’s working an hour a week. so that he can live and because he does a lot of charitable, amazing stuff. And when someone asked him, “Don’t you feel bad that you’re a 50/50-profit split with your partner and he’s working five days a week and you’re working an hour a week?” 

And he said he said no because of the quality and depth of what I give, which I believe 100% in, and the business is very successful. So, he’s like, he doesn’t equate time for dinner.

It’s true because people sit there, and they brag about how they work 40 hours a week or 50 hours a week. But how hard are you working? Working right? Are you doing quality work, or are you winging it and watching Netflix on the side while typing or entering data into the computer?

videos on Netflix.

Woah, Woah, Woah, Woah. Do you have access to the tabs I have open right now?

Do you see that I have Netflix up close?

Not sure.

I need to close this right now.

We think about that word. Productivity means producing. It doesn’t mean being busy.

True, you weren’t busy.

“Busy” is a cuss word.

Too much is the problem, right? I’m busy. I’m busy. I’m busy.

What does that mean?

Whereas, if we go back to what we were saying, if I’m putting myself first, I’m primed to be the best version of myself, which means I can get more done in less time because I’m focused. My decision-making ability is primed. There’s less chance of me making mistakes. I’m not going to redo things right, so I’m getting more done in less time. I’m more present with the people that are in my life, so it’s increasing my relationships, which increases my happiness, which gives me more energy, making me even more productive, and then that’s the will that we’re running down.

You know, don’t you sometimes wish that you could? When you’re working instead of using hours, you know to equate what you get paid. I guess it’s the quality of the effort that you put in because you could. Put in an hour. which could be the equivalent of somebody else’s 8 hours, right?

So, if you put in an hour, that is so effective, right? You’ve made decisions. You’ve done everything necessary. For the business and the other person, just a little slower than you because of the way. They work; it just means we work differently, right?

Yeah, I don’t charge by the hour for that exact reason.

Yeah, there’s nothing more valuable than the last day of work before vacation.

Great, I can’t do it.

Nothing gets done more than that day. You could cram more into that last day before a vacation than on any other day in the month.

Yeah, yeah. This week or the year Yeah, those days, yeah.

Yeah, so you were saying you don’t charge by the hour for that reason, right?

Yeah, well, the way I look at it logically, OK, so. What are the tasks to be done Let’s say I’m working with a client? So, what’s the challenge, right? right? How much time have we got to work together? If it’s like how many months, what’s the goal? What are we going to do to get to that goal?

And then we figure out, you know, what we need to make that happen. It’s not Yeah, it’s different for everyone. It’s a different recipe for everyone. And so, my priority is: what do we need to get the result? And it’s that it can be different for everyone. I am sure in an hour I will have a call with someone.

They will learn some information, or they may get some more hearts or anything like that, but if we’re talking about actual change now, it’s not going to happen in an hour anyway, so I’m not going to charge by the power, you know, and it is a hard thing to do with depth and quality.

But that’s why at the very beginning I will talk about your responsibility, my responsibility, the system, the process, how it’s going to work, and if we are both 100% here. We’re going to get an amazing result. Right.

That’s the depth and the quality, not how many hours we put in.

Well, and it’s accountability. Everybody is accountable for this to succeed This is where I’m going to push you or drag you along. This is where you have to play your part, too  

Yeah, especially as a mentor, right?

I can’t, I’m not, come and live with you and, like, stand by your side and watch you do things to make sure you’re doing them. If I did that, I’d be charging even more.

Right. 

And my wife would be very unhappy.

Yes, yes, yes.

That wouldn’t be right, but we’re teaching every person to learn that they are capable of accelerating their own life, changing their mindset, and developing their own habits.

That’s the point.

This is a huge discussion between time and value. And I know in the corporate world, the military picks an industry when they talk about promotions and things of that nature. They talk about something. There’s a cuss word that they use called “seniority”

It’s similar to serving time. has anything to do with the value they bring to the table? Do they have a couple more stories in their war chest? They do. They have a couple more lessons that they’ve learned, probably. That does not equate to them being worth a crap at the next level.

It’s so interesting, isn’t it? How can you be good at this one role? So, like in television, we’d have all these designers. They said they’d be the best, most senior designer. So, then they get promoted to manager, and what’s that got to do with whether you’re good at this role? And then you get out. As a reward, you get put into a different role with a different set of skills.

It doesn’t make any sense.

Yep, they do the military, they say. In any case, to me, in the military, you get promoted one level above your usability. Because you are good at that level doesn’t necessarily mean anything at the next level.

Right. 

So, if you’re good at being a department head, your next logical step is being a commanding officer in charge of a whole unit and everything but just because success at one level could lead to success in the next model, it doesn’t mean you have the tools, the ability, the ability to ask all the questions needed for that next level. So, the military talks about that quite a bit. Is it that people end up with their final rank as they were promoted one level above the last thing that they were any good at?

What’s the success rate when that happens? I can’t imagine it being very good.

Well, it’s for the military It’s the systems and processes in place that back up every position Because of the systems and processes and the people in place, that allows that to be successful.

even though that individual might not be the best candidate.

Yeah, yeah.

particular position

Right, because the commanding officer will have his executive officer and his executive team This big. They’ll have a team of department heads, each responsible for their thing, even if the CEO is a bad leader.

Everyone else at every level is still responsible for all the things that they’re going to be doing, and you’ll see it in the news, right? The most common thing you see in a military version is a commanding officer relieved for failure to perform, inability to do so, or loss of confidence. That’s the one loss of confidence, right? They got promoted to that position that they had no business being in, and because they were poor leaders, they couldn’t work with the system that was in place, and they got removed.

Yeah, it’s interesting and leadership, but sure You know, I believe some people are more naturally born to be leaders. If you look at personality profile tests and human design and all those kinds of things, some people are more naturally born to be leaders. And while there are skills that can be learned, there are people who are just more natural leaders who can excel at leadership, so if you want your organization or team to succeed, to function well requires leadership. I mean, this is a whole other discussion, right? Leadership is built and, like, what’s the one thing the world needs to understand the definition of right now? So, there’s a big difference between leadership and dictatorship. And I think there are a lot of people out there with the label of leader that is not. They are dictators.

They are telling people what to do That’s not leadership. And what I love about the modern world and the free market and entrepreneurship is that now. All of us can become a leader in one way or another and influence positive change simply by being role models. You have to tell anyone to do anything.

You show up as the best version of yourself, and can you imagine the last two years that all that’s happened? Can you imagine how different the world would be if everyone just said, “I’m going to just be the best person I can be and I’m going to be more curious than judgment”?

Oh, I will That’s the greatest thing right there, curiosity. Before you make a judgment, pass judgment on any individual. Go to curiosity and then go to intent from that curiosity. Because if you do that, it softens everything because sometimes you know a friend says something to you and you’re like, That kind of had an edge. Well, wait for a second Let me hang on. Am I hungry? Be inquisitive here Am I hungry? Is everything right at this moment and I do have an edge here and then, with intent, if she’s my friend, is she saying this because she’s being supportive and maybe because of the state I’m in right? I’m missing judgment or communication, correct? If we go to curiosity and intent, chances are we can soften that message quite a bit.

For sure, judgment ends in a period. Curiosity is a continuous conversation.

Yeah, absolutely.

Yes, right and

For the first time in human history, if the world leaders had come out during COVID and said something like, “Hey, every world leader is scared of something We’re going to try some stuff. We’re going to try some stuff. And you know what? We might not get it right. We’re going to try something and get feedback, and three days from now we’re going to try something different. because we’ve got information and feedback. How much easier would this thing have been if the leaders had come out and said that up front? We would have been understanding.

And even if they had, there still would have been judgement. As a result, there have been judgments. You can’t please everyone, but the point is that they should be role modeling mature adult leadership behaviors.

We didn’t hire them to be leaders; we hired them to be representatives, and they’re representing exactly who we are, right?

You know, but, you know, as a Brit who’s only three years into living in America, I can say that, and I’ve traveled a lot around the world, most people are wonderful people, and most people are quite curious. But who has the loudest voices and who gets represented more?

The squeaky wheel gets the oil.

Yeah, go ahead. The fringes get the voice because everyone in the middle already agrees.

Yeah, yeah. So, can I just ask everyone that listens to this in your circle to just aim to be a wonderful role model? So be the best you can be for everyone, so that’s the new phrase. Are you just being the best that you can be, and I think it’s happening?

I mean, I’m very unfortunate to be surrounded by some amazing people, and I’ve consciously put myself in that space. But what it’s done is it’s made me realize how many people are intentionally trying to positively influence this kind of change in their lives, in their industry, and the world.

From anything, not always, not even in the personal development space, but from everything, some people are intentionally showing up, curiously trying to be the best version of themselves.

Let’s talk about the positive aspects of social media. That’s a positive opportunity for that, so let’s make that the loud voice.

I like that.

Yeah, no arguments here There were no lies told, and the podcast has come to an end.

That’s it.

How is the sun shining?

We’ve accomplished transmission. It’s over. That’s it to wrap See you all next week.

No, no, no. So, James, what have you got coming up?

I hinted at it earlier, but I would like to share it again.

Oh yes, please.

16 and 17 weeks ago. We (me and my wife) got some news. I mentioned it earlier. I kind of mentioned it, but I’m going to mention it properly. 17 weeks ago, we got some news. We are expecting our first baby. So, this is a whole new chapter of our life that’s happening, and it’s exciting and beautiful, and we’re, you know, very excited.

He will never sleep again, so anyway.

And that’s my idea of accountability, is that it now allows me as a coach to have real-life experience of parenting. So, in a year or two years, I plan to release something that will assist new parents in functioning as effectively as possible.

I mean, with an unpredictable day, you know, that’s my, that’s the way I’m going to hold myself accountable, right? We’ve been through a lot of craziness, but I know that this is a whole new thing.

But we’re excited.

A wonderful new chapter in your life? And, you know, it’s funny having children. They teach you so much about yourself. And that has been for me. I have two boys. They are, and they’re amazing human beings.

I mean, I learned a lot about myself. I learned that I have low patience, but they taught me how to become patient to some degree, you know, and I love that. I love that they enriched me in that way, and they’re amazing creatures, and what you see in them and how they affect you as a human being, it’s going to be great.

You’re honest, unfiltered, untainted. You know, beautiful, right? And I would imagine I have a lot of friends and family with kids that I spend time with, right? And I would imagine that where we feel like we aren’t judging, we have grown.

The honesty and the purity of this are what I see as a great reminder, and I try and learn a lot from my younger self because of this. I know that he was very curious, and so I think I feel like, ah, and here’s another giveaway Our daughter is going to teach us a lot.

You already know, yeah? How did you really

We found out, at like 7 weeks, there’s this new thing. It’s like there’s a certain point early where they can tell by right below the blood test. I think it’s amazing.

You’re kidding me?

Yeah, yeah.

Oh my gosh.

And then we went into the other scan where you can see this 4-inch human that has arms and legs, and then there’s confirmation there as well.

As in 3D?

No, the 3D ones. OK, Next one. OK, we should have done it.

Oh my gosh, it’s so crazy that they could tell so early. We had to wait for a lot of things to happen.

Remember their blood as well.

Yeah, we’d wait three days till after our kid was born to find out.

We had no idea.

Jesus, Travis.

Of course, it’s complete BS, but here’s the deal You are in a fantastic place, James, you, and Emily. You have something that I missed out on having the chance to do because I didn’t learn many of the lessons that I needed to know to be a quality parent until it was too late.

And I know it’s never too late, right? But children and this is proven from birth until age 7, about 8, experienced life on board. We talked about modeling. They onboard everything that happens in their world as their operating system, with no filter, with no questioning them on board as our operating system, so when you tell your lovely daughter that she’s going to be intelligent, powerful, whatever she dreams that she can create and bring into this world, she’s going to believe you.

We should tell her that she’s beautiful, smart, and wonderful. She’s going to believe you. And when people say the opposite in school because that’s what kids do right now, you’re ugly or mean or whatever, right? She will believe them because her operating system will Say no, that’s not true at all, my dad It tells me I’m wonderful, I’m lovely, I’m intelligent.

Isn’t that exciting? That excites me.

It’s like, so exciting.

But yeah, I’m aware I didn’t know this. It’s like your conscious mind doesn’t even know. begin to be there until like 8 or something, right? Yeah, yeah.

And so, I appreciate you saying that Travis, because that’s yeah, I’m so you have no idea how obsessed I’m going to be.

It’s exactly what it’s

I even bought Emily an EMF-blocking blanket so that when she’s on her laptop, she has that on her lap.

Oh my God, that’s so funny.

Right, so honestly, there’s going to be some obsession.

We’re learning all this new stuff, so like for the kids, like something we did for our children, we never force them to clean off their plate. It’s some imaginary thing that parents from all times said was A scarcity might say you’ve got to clean off your plate because we never did. Our children listen to their bodies when they are hungry and eat when their bodies tell them to.

They paused. It’s amazing. She probably sounds like an amazing mother.

Yeah, but I didn’t learn this **** till. Way later, there are a couple of things I did. Wrestling was one of the few things I knew well in general, and it just clicked for me. asked my daughter. She’ll love to tell you.

How did yours turn out? How did your daughter?

My daughter is 19 and married and out of the house, and my son is 14.

You know, like I would not have, I think. My God, I don’t know these days.

I served in the military for 22 years. I’ve already retired from military service. I’m 40. Yeah, do we want to talk about how old Carol is? We can do that.

Oh, you jerk. I knew you were going to

I was, like, hoping you were going to gloss over it. She’s mad. She’s mad. I’m not sure how old she is, but she looks lovely and amazing. Who cares about the number or the age?

Let’s face it, about 22. I’d say you’re about 22. I am 52 years old and have a 24 and a 26.

Isn’t it a number?

It is a number. Fantastic. As I said, Travis, you’re only 40. Here’s the thing: this is about what you preach, James. This is about taking care of yourself so that you can be good for others. And I didn’t learn this until much later, but I also know that I have to stay fit. mentally, physically, and emotionally, right? And spiritually, for that matter.

Did you manage to stay fit? You don’t have to.

Oh yes, I have to because of my profession. I have to. Do you know how much it costs me to buy a leather suit?

A kangaroo leather suit?

Kangaroo leather, yes. too much?

Is it because of it? It has an extra bounce when you guys’ crash.

I can see. Dad jokes have evolved significantly.

This is the only reason I have kids: so, I have the legal ability to tell Dad jokes. I have terrible dad jokes as well.

My wife always jokes when I tell a bad dad joke. My dad’s name is Roger, so she would just blame it on my dad. She would say, “Roger, because. It’s mine.

That’s what you get for modeling, right?

We’re all back until it’s all cyclical. He’s correcting me for being a good person. Having a good dad joke That’s all perfect.

You’re just practicing for your new baby girl.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You are going to have so much fun with her, and she is going to teach you so much about yourself, and that’s what kids do. And they don’t. I didn’t even mean to do it, but I love that they’re in our lives to teach us more about ourselves. There are so many others. Facets that we don’t even know until they’re

This is something I could discuss.

This is the best personal development course you could ever go through.

Well, you’re going to, you’re going to see. I know you have clients, and I’m aware of personal boundaries and other issues that may arise. You’re going to see that your toddler has no problem enforcing her boundaries That’s mine.

Right. 

Your daughter is going to enforce her boundaries without any Yeah, yeah.

Give a **** about anyone else in the room That’s her She knows it’s hers and she doesn’t care what it is. It’s mine Give it here. Right, but somewhere along the way, we convince kids. That’s not to say whatever they’re feeling or experiencing is not real or not true. And we force them out of that thing.

Oh, you have to clean off your plate, kids. Hold onto that *** for most of their lives.

Yeah, it’s interesting, the Yeah,

Yeah, most everything you deal with as a coach is fixing the thing that got stolen from them as a kid. OD, I wish that you were around when, like, my family was raising me, because I didn’t get that kind of thought put behind the modeling, right?

I had no modeling, so your daughter is going to be eons ahead of any of us. Then that’s exciting because she gets to write her narrative of who and what she wants to be.

I’m excited. I appreciate that you’re going to have I’m very excited.

We’ve talked about a lot of things. We’re talking about kids and relationships and leadership and a lot of things. And here’s the deal. Every interaction you have with someone else gives you the chance to model that you like what they did. I’m going to do that, or you have the chance to reject what they showed you. Oh, we’re doing it this way. Oh man, I will never do that when I’m in charge. Fortunately, fortunately for me, I was able to outright reject most of the things that were modeled for me when I was growing up.

Not a lot of kids can do that, and they follow right along with whatever was modeled.

Good, bad, indifferent, violent, toxic, whatever those traits are. R-90 plus percent of people are just going to model what they’re showing. It’s very rare to have the ability to reject.

I’m still trying.

Yeah, no, and I say to you, yeah, I yeah, I do appreciate that.

How did you learn to code?

But it’s awareness. I think there’s a lot of what I call the unconscious. There is now incompetence. People are not, they’re just not aware of where they are in competencies, and I think that in any journey or personal development stage, one is aware, right, just becoming aware of or like in a business. We spoke before about all the things that make me the best of who I am and all the things that compromise the best of who I am, so being consciously incompetent and consciously competent. And then do your best at, you know, evolving and growing, being competent or just accepting them. But either way, you know, just be aware. Yeah, awareness is a huge piece of how I’m aware that the situation that you’re seeing is not the way. You should be doing it Being told Carol, were you told that being nice was important growing up?

Oh yeah, I’m supposed to be nice to everybody.

Cool. Were you taught? You’d be nice to yourself first Why the hell not? Yeah, I know it’s ****** **, right? It is, but that’s why we’re talking about this We have a show that has a job.

Yes, sir, so sound. Right. You get to be nice to yourself now, yeah?

Oh yeah, it took me a long time to start being nice to myself once the kids were out of the house. But it was late in my life, and that took some doing right because it’s not a natural thing to do. You have to do it every day until it becomes a habit.

I’ve got a great model if your clients and your listeners would like to be this a great, simple model for how a growth mindset works. It’s very simple.

Let’s have it.

It’s called RW ID, which is the relative weight of importance and duration. So, this is how we develop new actions, how we develop habitual behavior, right? So, a lot of people think it’s I’m going to take a thought or an action and just keep repeating it, and eventually, it will become a habit. But where they miss a trick is the emotional part. So, the relative weight of importance is: how important is it to me? So, what emotion happens when I think or do this thing, and then the duration of this is for good and bad things, right?

So, if you have a negative thought, that’s walls It’s because, at some point, you gave it and gave it a relative weight of importance. It was probably to protect you, right? And then you did it often enough and it solidified.

So, we can rewire You write down, OK, so what are some of the things that deserve to be on my mental dashboard? Write them down and then give them some relative weight of importance, and then keep repeating them as long as you can, and you will grow new neural networks in your brain It’s that simple, but it takes commitment. A simple process, not exactly easy to implement.

It’s just the emotion of it that’s the key because when you listen to this great podcast, I can’t read the name of the guy, but he’s like a neuroscientist, and he was talking about what happens in the brain when our brains grow. Right. So, we have these chemical messengers, dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin, that when you are in a struggle, you remind yourself why you’re going through this. Let’s say you’re on a bike in a peloton and it’s hard. I don’t know, I want to stop. And then at that moment, you remind yourself why it is important for me to keep going.

Oh, because I’m going to feel amazing or I’m going to fit into that dress or those pants or I’m going to… whatever the thing is, and at that moment, you feel good. You get a hit of that chemical right there, and if you keep doing that, what will happen is every time you’re in a struggle, your automatic switch of reminding yourself why will kick in and you’ll keep going.

And that’s why the why is so important.

I love that the three of us are thinking about the same thing.

Great minds, guys. great minds

Kangaroo leather jumpsuit.

Yeah, yes. OK,

And just, OK, I’m going to tell you why it’s a kangaroo and why did I choose kangaroo?

We’ve got to know. I have to know. Our listeners have to know. OK, OK, James is texting me over here like a kangaroo. What’s up, bro?

OK, so James, I ride a motorcycle, right?

And so, one of my businesses is a motorcycle track organization, and I used to be an ex-racer. I no longer race, but are you still an ex-racer? You said you used to be an ex-racer.

That would imply that you’re OK.

Oh, I used to be a racer Sorry, I’m ex.

Yeah, OK.

Racer “Yes, thank you. In any case, thank you, Travis.

Points have been added.

Yes, with barely any value anyway.

The reason we do the kangaroo

The thing about kangaroo is that it’s actually a lot lighter and more durable, and so I can crash multiple times in a suit that’s made out of kangaroo and, you know, still keep using it versus a cow suit, which is a lot heavier. And when you’re riding motorcycles or you’re racing motorcycles, it’s all about horsepower, right? So, the heavier something is, the more horsepower it uses So we are right, right? So, every little bit that we can shave off counts, including suits and shoes, and changing just from cow to leather can be the difference of like 5 to 10 pounds.

Yeah, for sure. Wow.

How much does your hair weigh? I love your long hair. I’m just curious. You say every pound matters. But your next race doesn’t matter anymore.

Well, OK, to be fair, I braid it and shove it down my suit so that there’s no drag.

I was going to say, does that make it lighter? But it’s just the drag?

Yeah, it’s just a drag.

That’s awesome. That’s awesome. It used to be an A racer, yeah. Cool, huh?

I think the best explanation is still that the kangaroo leather has more bounce.

Maybe it’s like you can do that, Pocket Travis. You know, keeping all the, you know, all these things in means you don’t have to bring a bag.

Yeah, oh yeah. The pouch is the extra pouch, yeah. You don’t need a backpack. It’s covered.

Yeah, all the extra stories. Oh, my goodness Like, why am I?

I am on with these two jokers Well, he was a funny thing to gain confidence in, and I rarely did this. I would go up against professional racers, right? And the reason why I would do I wanted to see how quickly they could turn the bike, how quickly they would accelerate, and where they would break. Because where they did these things made them so much quicker and I wanted to see how far they could push the traction on the tires.

So, watching all these things when you’re 2 up when you can feel the forces, you know, being pushed and pulled every which way you’re going. Plus, being behind them when they shifted their body and set themselves up for the next corner, I could see and feel all these things, which only made me a better rider.

And it made me realize what a chicken I was because they were going way faster with me on the back of the bike than I would ever attempt to do by myself.

By yourself? Yeah, wow. But it is interesting, and that’s a lesson for life, isn’t it? When we surround ourselves with people that are ahead of us and push us, it does bring something out in us. You know, I believe that everyone operates That’s such a low percentage of what they’re capable of, and I think that everyone is more capable than they realize they are, and one way to kind of prove that to yourself is to try and surround yourself with people, but now it won’t inspire everyone to be civil.

Some people get jealous. If you can feel inspired by people that are doing things around you, you can go to that next level rather than feeling jealous or comparing yourself.

It does help you up your game, right? Because if there’s a human being that was born just by my daughter, there’s going to be one, just a baby that was born. Where their lives go after that, we’re all made of the same stuff, we’re all capable of doing incredible things, and sometimes you’ve got to, you know, metaphorically sit on the back of a bike that’s pushing the boundaries so that you know that it’s possible.

Right, well, you also need to become very comfortable with being uncomfortable all the time.

They uncover, of course, everything that anyone ever achieved that they’ve been proud of. They were scared of attempting it, or maybe there was some small fear, right?

Absolutely, but it’s possible because you’ve seen other people do it, right? And until you attempt it, how scary is it? You know, not yet yeah.

I’m reading a book right now that talks about the author’s constant reading of The Rise of Superman. To kill this science off.

Oh, that’s a great book.

And they talked about this exact concept being a discovery in, uh, you go into flow, what is flow, what is the flow state, what chemicals are required and all this stuff, but they talk about it’s Dissecting the growth of humans over time Then this becomes a thing of time versus value, right? They get into extreme sports, and how are they able to grow by leaps and bounds in this, when a lot of it is getting into danger and feeling the flow state? But how do you live without it? It’s largely a community sport, too. Because when a crowd gathers,

Yeah, group flow is a lot easier to achieve, yeah.

Yeah, and able to push themselves farther and as soon as they see it done, once they know it’s possible and they know they can do it, but if they haven’t? Ever seen it all just theory getting into creativity, but if they’re there and they could say, “You know, they were talking about this from this point and, I think, Yosemite.”

This was a big boulder, and they couldn’t figure out how to do it This one guy shows up to the group. There were like 20 people there. No one has been able to do it. Months have gone by, but one guy goes over and he’s like, “This line right here,” and he’s like, “Yep And he gets to the point where everyone fails. Everyone likes All right, here it is No one has been able to This whole group of people, 20 people, haven’t been able to do this thing for months upon months upon months. No one in their group will do it.

This guy comes in He does a little jump, pulls himself up, and then works his way up the wall, and that very day, four or five more people do it.

Other people did it, too. Isn’t it amazing? The same thing happened with Roger Bannister when he broke the three-minute mile right now. And everyone thought that your body was going to explode if you did that. He did it, and then after that, everyone was doing it, and it was so interesting. Like there’s this thing in the brain that stops your performance because of your belief.

It’s a limited belief.

You know, so work on your belief systems and that anything is possible and you’re going to, you’re just going to start stepping everything up. Prime stuff with awesome people.

Yeah, very much so. You have to surround yourself. With awesome, awesome people and people that push you to your limits all the time.

I will hold you accountable for your ****.

Yeah, one of the reasons I married my wife is because she pushes me every day. She’s an incredibly awesome woman. I would not be here today without her, honestly. because she needs a great partner. Like she’s always, she’s never had a ceiling. And sometimes that’s been, that’s, you know, had to be scary, but she doesn’t understand the impossible.

Right. 

And that’s an amazing person to be.

Without a doubt, So, well, congratulations on the announcement of your child because now

We’re getting ready It’s public Oh, it was we.

And when she does?

I made it public last week, so we’re good. I’m not alone.

Oh, you did? made it public last week. OK, so what did she do then, James?

We are It says February 9th, but that’s a subjective date You know, sometime in February. Right. There will be a new amazing and game-changing woman on this planet who’s going to change everything.

Well, if it’s the 8th, our daughter’s role-share birthday is in February, so yeah.

My son is on the 12th.

Or Aquarius’s Isn’t there a movie like the Age of Aquarius or something?

There is I knew you were going to go there. I don’t.

God damn it, Travis. You are so predictable.

Am I the cause? I’ve never actually seen it. I don’t know what it’s about. I’m sure there’s a song somewhere.

No, really.

No, I don’t know. What is it? I just know that it’s a thing. Yeah, it’s there. Yes, there is a movie called “The Age of Aquarius.”

And this song. And it’s a song, yeah.

I don’t know. It was like the end of a 40-year-old version or something, wasn’t it?

This song?

It was an anchorman, I think, wasn’t it?

Oh, was it?

Yeah, yeah.

You guys are saying, OK, so this has got to be a male thing. But men are so great at one-liners and movies and remembering all these little things about every single movie and I am at home. I’m horrible.

You probably have useful information in your head, Carol. We just like to fill our heads with, you know, useless movie trivia.

Well, there’s nothing. There’s something that you care about, Carol, that your intimate knowledge of far exceeds ours. Like kind of losing kangaroo leather.

Yeah, but I can’t. I can’t carry on. A conversation about whether I watched movies and one-liners, and I couldn’t even answer those questions.

Neither one is

That is valuable.

I’m not a comedian. I get paid for my one-liners, which is other than carrying a conversation.

Oh, my goodness.

And you’re so light anyway, it doesn’t take much to carry you, so it’s fine.

Jesus, here we go.

Here we go. Hey, James, are we getting ready to wrap this up here? What advice would you have for the audience? If they’re struggling right now, if they’re not, you know, fully expressing themselves as who they are and not living that authentic life, what advice would you have?

For them, would you know what I did today? I’m going to post it tomorrow, but I already created a post. I’m going to read it to you as the value I created a post. That, UM, is my top five tips on how to bounce back off failure. So how about that being the value? Wow, that’s why.

perfect for repurposing content. I’m all about repurposing.

So, I’m going to tell them about it. I’m going to post this.

No, you’re not. I’m going to sleep because this isn’t getting published.

They’re not going to get us.

by much, but it still had audio.

Because this whole thing… yeah.

Right. So, as I previously stated, I believe my Titan ability is the ability to bounce back.

And I think the phrase that goes along with that, for me, is that life is less about circumstance and more about perspective. For the same reason that whatever you’ve gone through, there’s someone else who’s gone through it and isn’t feeling as challenged by it. This means that it’s not the thing, it’s your perspective on the thing. And so top five, how to bounce back, and the quote I’ve got with this is that the comeback is always stronger than the

Oh, like that?

Not mine. It’s #1, acceptance and grief. Don’t waste time on blame, fear, or negativity except where you find yourself. Take a breath, get present, grounded, and forward. #2 See the value in the lessons? What? Why? What didn’t work and why? What did work, and why? And what can I change? #3 Rekindle the fire within after that failure. So, remind yourself of why you’re attempting this, why it’s important to you, and how it will feel when you succeed. It’s that subjective insertion we talked about now, before evaluating your performance. What have I learned about who I am and, at my best, how can I be better than yesterday and then finally be unattached to how the result must happen?

Maintain a broad perspective to pivot along the way and measure every moment of progress. But often, we have an idea in our minds about how a result should happen, and that narrows our focus. So, as previously stated, care is not your business; keep your eye on the prize every day, be excited about the outcome, and something will happen.

Uh, I love exactly what you’ve just said, James. It reminds me of a friend of mine. I can’t remember what story we were talking about, but we’ve got a lot of people that I know that is asking. Or greatness. They’re destined for greatness. I’m going to do great things. It’s going to be amazing. When I impact a billion people, I’m going to do all of these things And I asked him, like, do you think you’re capable of that right now, today? And he’s like, “Oh no, there are so many trials, tribulations, fires that are going to have to take place before I’m capable of that thing. There’s so much pain or so many things that I have to be temperate. Right. If we’re talking about physics and metallurgy or glass, you have to be tempered to be stronger. You have to go through the fire to get stronger because if that’s the thing you’re asking for, this great, amazing thing, of course, you’re going to have to go through lessons you’ve never experienced in your life.

It’s going to be painful.

It’s going to be challenging.

It’s going to stress you out as a person, and it should, because the only

way to get to that great thing.

The thing is to get strong enough to get there, and that’s only going to happen as you go through and learn those lessons and do those things and be that person.

So, if you’re asking for greatness, you better be expecting these hard lessons, because there’s no way to get to greatness without him.

Yeah, another struggle.

Yeah, it’s a wonderful thing.

James, wrap it up here and let us know how people can find and contact you. Where’s the one place that you want them to go?

I guess the easiest place is the website, which is growthedge.com, and on there you’ve got all my social media links and everything, and you can reach out, e-mail me, or say hi.

Now there are some downloadable on there and some other podcasts, obviously amazing. As for this podcast, but you know, some other ones, there’s some content you can download.

Thank you so much, James, for joining us today.

Thank you so much. It’s been fun, yeah. real pleasure.

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